How to Survive a Gay Wedding Expo

Survive a Gay Wedding Expo

The thing I love about being engaged is that you get to do and say so many fun things that you couldn’t do before like, “I’m sorry Officer, I had to go 20 miles over the speed limit! I’m engaged!” or getting to tell your boss, “Excuse me Mr. Peterman, I need to come in late tomorrow…after all, I AM ENGAGED!” And it doesn’t stop there. This past weekend in New York City the first ever gay wedding expo was held at Borough Hall in Brooklyn! Wahoooo!

We had no idea what we were in for and we had a blast! There were over 60 vendors there and everyone wants to be part of your wedding. I had so much fun that by the time my fiancé and I left I was wore out, dehydrated and half-damn-handicap. I could barely walk! So, to avoid future exhaustion, I want to give you a couple tips to help you if you ever encounter the Titan known as: (with a booming voice) The Gay Wedding Expo! Oh lawd! I’m having flashbacks just thinking about it!

The Best Gay Wedding Blog Ever1) Pace Yourself: Wedding expos have tons of food to sample and taste. Before heading into the expo, try eating something light or not eating at all (after all, nothing tastes as good as skinny feels) so you still have room for food. We ate too much before getting there and honestly I regret it. Ten minutes into the event, I had the meat sweats. If it weren’t for a nearby wall to lean on, I would have had to take a Thanksgiving Day-style nap to make it through the rest of the day! So pace yourself; try and spread out cake and food sampling throughout your entire time at the event. Don’t shovel it all in at once and almost pass out like I did.

The Best Gay Wedding Blog Ever2) Ask about Pricing: Money is always a sensitive subject no matter what the context. The most beneficial information we got from the expo was pricing. I didn’t care if the vendor was selling couture hats for your baby-mama’s-bests-friend’s-cousin’s-sister-in-law, I always asked, “How much?” In the end we left with a really good idea of what things like flowers, cakes, and décor can cost. It was a well-needed reality check. So take a deep breath, draw on a pair of serious eyebrows and be prepared to talk numbers… you’ll be happy you did.

The Best Gay Wedding Blog Ever3) Speak in Code: Before you even set one ashy toe into the expo, you and your boo need a code word or phrase that secretly says, “I don’t like this vendor at all and I want to leave.” It’s inevitable that a cake designer will try and talk your ear off for 15 minutes about the art of blown sugar, and you’ll want to escape. Try code phrases that require you to speak directly to your boo like, “Do you have any chap-stick?” or “Oh, did you remember to feed the dog?” Most vendors don’t even register the exchange between the two of you while your fiancé, on the other hand, gets the message loud and clear that it is time to go!

Even though it was a little overwhelming, we had a great time at the wedding expo. It was like the auto show of gay weddings. If you were a vendor and you had a pamphlet, I took it. Now that I look back on it maybe that wasn’t the best choice. I mean, really, what am I going to do with four lesbian themed magazines? But I was blinded by excitement. It was contagious. Not in the Gwyneth Paltrow, convulsing, dying, “Contagion” way. But more like the kid in a candy store with great fashion sense way. But I digress…

What I want you to understand more than anything is that your wedding is going to be an amazing event that celebrates your love and commitment to one another. A wedding expo is just another resource you can use to help bring that vision of how your special day should look to life. So, the next time there is a wedding expo happening in your area, go! Embrace the day, gather information and don’t eat your weight in shish kabob’s unless you want those meat sweats.